Code, nerd culture and humor from Greg Knauss.

So Larry and Heather gave Joanne and I a breadmaker for our wedding, a Mr. Loaf.

I was, needless to say, overcome with joy. Mr. Loaf was one of my contributions to the registry, solely because of the name. Mr. Loaf, you'll forgive me, is a hugely funny name. Yeah, Mr. Coffee broke this ground a long time ago, but "Loaf" is a much more amusing word than "Coffee." It's like calling a new pair of Levi's "Mr. Pants."

Unfortunately, Mr. Loaf had, um, been around. After opening the box, we found that he'd apparently been bought, abused and returned. Mr. Loaf had seen happier days.

Sad Mr. Loaf. Lonely Mr. Loaf. Dusty, kinda gross Mr. Loaf.

But when we tried to take him back to the store, they didn't have a replacement to offer. They were all out of Mr. Loaves.

They did, however, have a Breadman.

Which, of course, is Mr. Loaf's secret identity, for when he's fighting crime.

Hi there! My name's GREG KNAUSS and I like to make things.

Some of those things are software (like Romantimatic and Buzz Clock), Web sites (like the Webby-nominated Metababy and The American People) and stories (for Web sites like Suck and Fray, print magazines like Worth and Macworld, and books like "Things I Learned About My Dad" and "Rainy Day Fun and Games for Toddler and Total Bastard").

My e-mail address is greg@eod.com. I'd love to hear from you!

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