You know what today is? Today is Unjustified Self-Esteem Day! Isn't that great? Today is the day that you cast aside the insecurity, the doubts, the tiny nagging voice that tells you that you have no idea what you're doing and soon -- any second now -- everybody is going to find out and point and laugh and make you want to curl into a little ball and die. Oh, no. Today is the day that you can fully embrace whatever half-assed notion occurs to you -- Unjustified Self-Esteem Day, for instance -- and insist against all arguments and odds that it's a great idea! How could it be anything else? You thought of it, and you're just an incredibly amazing person! You can do no wrong! You are a churning juggernaut of unjustified self-esteem! You are great.

Unless you're the sort of person who feels unjustified self-esteem on a regular basis. Then it's Fully-Justified Self-Loathing Day. Try spending some time where you belong, jackhole.