I drove something like six hundred miles yesterday and learned a few things in the process:

• Bug ichor is clear. At least that particular bug, and at that particular angle.

• Never trust a restaurant whose name is a pun.

• The same three women sing the frequency -- "One oh two point seven!" -- of every FM radio station in the country.

• The sign that says "See Canyon, Next Right" is directional, not instructional.

• You know you're in the boonies when you hit "Seek" on the radio and the first five stations it finds are, in order: religious, religious, country, religious, country. Also, use of the phrase "Rockin' the tri-counties area!" is a sign from God to speed up.

• When you finally give up on finding a quirky local beachside restaurant that isn't either packed or completely lacking in parking and head into IHOP, it's still worth your time to find one that doesn't smell like a wet rag.