The greeting card industry has apparently latched onto the belief that the American male is totally emotionally inert. I spent half an hour looking through Mother's Day cards for Joanne, desperately trying to find one that didn't apologize for not saying "I love you" enough. "The words don't always come easy..." "I know I don't tell you this enough..." "Sweetheart, I should say it more often..."

I mean, come on.

Now, if there were cards that apologized for not buying them until the last second, that would be a different story...