February 25, 2001

Things to Do, in Increasing Order of Boredom and Desperation, for Twelve Hours at the Office on a Sunday with Nobody Else There while Waiting for a Grindingly Slow ARCserve to Restore Gigabytes and Gigabytes of Data that Disappeared Saturday Night for No Good Reason: First in a Series



Check e-mail

Browse all the sites you keep bookmarked

Wish you'd brought a book

Watch the progress indicator and try to do extrapolations in your head

Work on ulcer

Check e-mail

Browse every site you've ever visited before

Curse VonNeumann and his stupid, stupid machine

Check e-mail

Try to nap

Order Chinese for lunch

Browse every site you've ever read about, ever heard about or that exist at domains named for common words

Order pizza for dinner, six hours early, so it can be put in the fridge and be nice and cold

Climb onto desk and lift out acoustical tile, to see what's up there

Run up and down hall

Run up and down hall, hooting

Perform a summersault, even though you are way too old and way too fat

Make lots of long-distance calls to friends

Make lots of long-distance calls, dialing randomly

Check e-mail and curse your loser friends, who all apparently have better things to do than check their e-mail

Eat the ice cream that was left in the freezer from the Christmas party

Jiggle the handles on all the other suites on the floor

Really explore the bathroom

Actually read your company's marketing material

Smell the furniture, checking to see if the armrests, because they come in contact with skin, are any different than the rest

Smell the furniture, just because it's there

Toe maintenance!

Actually read your own site



 



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